series of unfortunate events

2nd day of my new shift and the mofo was fuckin early again, hope to keep the ball rollin 'til friday. But you know, shit happens, sometimes you feel like the universe is conspiring to keep you from reaching your destination on time. Example, you're about to leave and you forgot your phone, money or your dick (which reminds me of what my mom would always tell me - if your dick's detachable, you prolly lost it already). While on the road there's heavy traffic, as if all of the cars suddenly decided to have a let's-fuck-taylor's-day-convention. When you pay the cab driver he'd suddenly pull the i-don't-have-change move also known as force tipping. If you don't feel like a hot shot at that time, meaning almost broke, you ask the driver to swing by 7/11. Since you're in a hurry, you just buy whatever you see first inside the store, say a banana. Then you hand it over to the cashier including the big bill, she'll give you that look with a smirk and say "smaller bills please, we don't have change". The bitch is a fuckin clairvoyant, she knows what you're trying to pull. Just your luck right? i mean do you want me to tear my money in half so it would be smaller? Since you don't give up easily, you grab another item that has a bit higher value. Then ms. nostradamus accepts it, opens the cash reg and you see she got change, bitch right? You manage to pay the driver, walked like 500 meters and finally you're there. 

Congratulations, you're a year late, yet again dick head, boo hoo! I know, i mean people with tardiness issue, including me, will always blame the universe. We just hate to admit that we procrastinate a lot, or we stayed up late, or the usual ten minutes more please (see, it's really the universe's fault). So to all of us, hope we change or else we'll be late.... in paying our bills, coz we got motherfuckin fired.

sunnies - spf, button down - penshoppe, shirt - topman, jeans - custom, shoes - sperry
photos - gil

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